What is with "parents" today?

And by "parents" I mean people who marry people who already have children and claim to be parents.

Melanie has a firend and while I don't know the girl really well, by all accounts she's a pretty good kid. She is probably as annoying as all teenagers are. I'm not going to say she's a saint. But  typical kid who doesn't get into any real trouble--no pregnancies, no drinking, no drugs. But yeah. Since we currently have 5 teenagers (and two very advanced 12 year olds) in our house, I know they can drive you nuts! There are moments when you want to sell them to the circus--even if you know you'll lose money on the deal. But the moments are fleeting and most parents know that it is their job to raise these children to adulthood without breaking their spirit and with the end result being a fine upstanding member of society. The requirements are simple. The process is difficult. But you keep your eyes on the prize and do what is right. What is moral. What is required by God.

Well, recently, this friend was kicked out of her house. 16 years old. And the step has just decided that forr whatever reason he doesn't need to parent her or correct whatever he thinks she is doing wrong. He thinks that the right thing to do is just to kick her out. And the mom--the one who carried her in her womb for 9 months apparently thinks this is okay because she didn't stop it in any way.

I'll admit, I'm being really judgemental since I don't know all the details. But in the end, what story could you tell me that makes it okay to kick a 16 year old out of the house? Drugs? Drinking? Wouldn't a rehab fix the problem better? The family that took this girl in is also known to us. And appears to be a decent family. So I don't think the girl is beyond all hope.

I just don't get it! What are people thinking??????? I can't understand the selfishness of some people! If you can't handle--with Godly love--what it takes to raise a child and the special effort it must take to raise a step child. then keep your pants up, your skirt down, and don't get involved with people with kids!

I'm just so mad at people like this! Sometimes I want to elect myself the parent cop. I want to be able to walk around and smack people like this up side their head! I want to the one adminstering the reality check. Because these people need one! What is with people? Why do they think this is okay? In what world is it okay to say to a kid, "I give up on you?"

I wish I had a positive note to end on. I don't think there is one as long as people like this are in the world.

Comments

[Traci]

Not only those types of "parents" make me nuts but I have two friends who have left their husbands AND children in the last few months. One mom has 5 kids and only one would come with her. I don't think the other mom offered since her kids are 7 and 13. I CAN'T imagine leaving my kids. I'd leave my husband before my kids. Not that my hubby and I are having problems.

[Leigh Ann]

makes me nuts, too--things like that bring to mind the Keanu Reeves quote from "Parenthood"..."You know, you need a license to buy a dog, or to drive a car, hell you even need a license to catch a fish, but they'll let any a**hole be a father."
Sad, but true.

[Tracey P.]

That is very sad. It's always so much more surprising when it's the mom who gives up or walks away. I can't imagine doing it... even when my kids are at their worst.

My mom and dad got divorced when I was 11. My mom didn't even fight for custody of us... said it was "my dad's turn" and she basically walked away from us. She was in an out of our lives for a lot of years and now totally out.

There are a lot of selfish, clueless people out there having kids. My dad may not be perfect, but he's had a lot of challenges with us kids and he's never given up or walked away. Ever.

I hope things work out for your daughter's friend.

Tracey P.